Buckle up!

The purpose of Chinese Astrology is sometimes misunderstood as the discovery of oneself, and to a degree it is, but probably more important is the understanding of where you are in the bigger picture that has more relevance. Last year’s bigger picture was Metal Rabbit – we all had to ‘do the Rabbit’. The fortune you discovered was not only your own expression of life, but also your own ability to express yourself under the guidance of Rabbit. As the Year of the Rabbit comes to a close, we say goodbye to the most yin period in the 12 animal cycle. The time for introspection and subtle reflection is over, so too the quiet family home life. The discretion that motivates us in a year ruled by Rabbit, now turns very naturally into the expansive expression that is Dragon energy. This is the year to implement those plans you were at home hatching. It is time to step back out into the world armed with strength and confidence.

Are you ready for the Dragon?

The Dragon talked about in Chinese Astrology is the only supernatural sign in the Chinese calendar. It is associated with the rising sun in the east, with spring, and therefore with the life that begins anew after the long cold winter. Grand is the Dragon’s favourite scale. For Chinese philosophers, the unique power reflected in the Dragon is only of use when it is turned away from the egotistical exploration of oneself, and toward the dedication of helping others. Water Dragons are known as the “Rain Dragon” in China. To the agricultural societies in Asia rain brings life. The Dragon represents powerful leadership, change and creation. It is an icon of individuality and of ambition, of charisma and adventure, of grand generosity and confidence.

Picture the mystical Dragon flying high above mist covered mountains and lakes, it’s vast appetite for experience unhindered by the grounding aspects like earth or metal, instead the dramatic changeability of water guides it towards the unknown and uncharted. Its motivation is creation, excitement, and the profound realisation that the meaning of life is found in the experience of life, not in the conclusion. It is not the result that the Dragon seeks, merely the path of diversity and creativity.

This year brings a realisation of the deeper aspects of aspiration. For every person it will be different, it is hard to explain what everyone will experience, but you will see a bigger version of yourself. But don’t expect this year to be all smooth sailing. The profound quality that the water element lends this already expansive animal, and the natural fluctuations experienced within Dragon years, make for a very interesting year. These years are typically uneven, both in the material world and in the internal emotional/spiritual landscape. Years under the influence of the Water Dragon are characterised by hard work, restlessness and idealism. Constant change is here to stay!

With this we will all have to embrace the expansive revelation of our own unique capacities. Society will reinvent itself, and us along with it. Leadership may change, if not actually then figuratively. We will all have to revaluate what leadership means to us and to this world. What does the majestic Dragon say to us about how we see this world? How we will leave it for our children? For this is not a year to be bogged down in the local, but the global. Not the personal but the fraternal. Not the year but the millennia. Not you but us.

All prophecies and “end times” aside, 2012 – the year of the Water Dragon, is going to be a change for us all. The question is… how do you cope with change? Chinese astrology looks at relationships, between people, within people, and around them in both business and in play. Some animals will have a more natural capacity towards the movements required of the Dragon. Ideas of change and expression are not every animal’s best suit. As with any year, it is important to understand your own capacity within the auspices of that year.

Those born in a Dragon year are the best suited to this expression. Your innate tendencies toward expansion and adventure will serve you well this year. If this is you, lend a hand. If this is not you, try and catch one and hitch a ride. At the very least it will be exciting. Trust them, there’s nothing good on the tele. For those people born under the sign of the Snake, this year will be far more obvious than for most. The Snake and Dragon are uniquely bonded, but sometimes face trouble resolving these bonds – think Romeo and Juliet. At the very least your will invent a magical escape this year with your usual flair.

For those under the signs of Pig, Rat, Horse, Monkey and Rooster, you should be able to keep up and enjoy the ride. Your tenacity and diverse abilities will be of great use within the Dragons’ unique vision. Even Dragons’ need to come down from time to time, and when they do, you will be able to offer a unique compliment to this years’ excitement.

Ox’s may have a tough time handling all the change that occurs around them, but you’re tough and resilient and it will take more than a complicated year to bring you down. Those Tiger’s, Rabbit’s and Goat’s out there may find this year overly competitive and struggle to find the peace they strive to find. Weather you can handle this depends on the support you gather around you. – especially for those Rabbits who don’t share the Tiger’s power or the Goats adaptability. Finally, the loyalty of the Dog will be severely tested this year, try and remember it is not personal – it just is. Make sure your insurance is up to date, and remember to breathe. Allow your friends a bit of slack, they are doing the best they can under the circumstances too!

So for all of us it is time to drop the mask and reinvent ourselves. Such a dramatic opening in social change requires activity on all levels – the physical, emotional and the spiritual. Enjoy the unpredictability that is life. Move consciously toward those experiences that challenge you, and embrace the concepts of power, majesty and grace – whatever they mean to you. The Dragon is far too great to fight, so if you can, jump on it’s back, hang on and allow this year to fly by. You thought this year went fast. You ain’t seen nothing yet!

The profound await us!

If you would like to explore what the year of the Dragon means to you on a more personal level. Consider a Transit or Natal Chinese Astrology reading. Call Thomas on 0415 387 332.

(copyright Thomas Walsh/BreathingSpaceYoga2012)

At last – a comprehensive and connective series of yoga courses blending the fundamentals of hatha yoga with the wisdom of oriental, seasonal and vibrational medicine.

Study corrective asana, healing pranayama and traditional yogic philosophies as well as meditation, chakral and somatic bodywork with renowned therapists. Deepen your understanding of Ki FUSION Yoga and how the meridians, 5 elements and chakras engage and guide our entire being, in a fun, supportive and healing space. Discover and nurture your inner teacher through this truly unique, transformative style.

Designed, taught and mentored by senior teacher Denby Sheather and her team of dedicated practitioners. Limited numbers so please register your interest now!

Email denby@breathingspaceyoga.com.au or call 0413 747 644.

Springtime salutes renewal, regeneration & a revival of Self.

After time to reflect & being held in the depth & stillness of Winter we begin to stir, sensing the promise of warmer weather, fresh, crisp winds & budding opportunities – now is our time to be move, morph & be in the moment.

Physically you may feel restriction of the ankle, wrist & knee joints & maybe tightness along the inside lines of the legs, across the ribcage & around the neck & throat area. Excess tension can gather across the temples, behind the eyes, between the shoulderblades & along the outer sides of the legs, giving rise to crankiness, irritation & frustration… why won’t my body move how I want it too!??

Add to this unreliable, changeable weather – one day humid, the next, back to wintery chills – and it’s no wonder we start to feel frustrated, ungrounded and daydreaming of beachside paradise!

By flexing your mind along with your body you create space, lightness & a sense of expansion that allows your whole being to surrender, become more supple & find its’ seasonal flow.  Old thoughts & reactions can soften.  Opening up the heart will encourage trust so you can work into areas that may harbour weakness, injury or repressed feelings & memories.

Green foods will nourish your Liver & Gall Bladder to help restore metabolic function & balance, as well as whole & sprouted grains, light broths & miso soups.  A dash of apple cider vinegar in warm water each morning will stimulate & support the Liver so it can shift any sluggishness from the digestive tract.  Lighten the stress on these organs by eliminating dairy, processed foods & congestive meats & allow yourself to feel hunger without just eating out of habit.  Becoming conscious & aware of what, when & how you eat can help alleviate digestive pressure, regulate cravings & help you commit to making more appropriate choices for yourself.  Heaviness lifts, sinuses drain, eyes become clearer, thoughts become lighter, inspired & more intuitive & joints once restricted or weak, can experience improved mobility & strength.

Expression & release will renew not only your body but your mind, heart and your spirit – drawing confidence deep into your centre & helping you feel vital and empowered!  Become the person you know you truly are.   Give yourself permission to allow change into your life at this time of year and set yourself free…

This transition from winter to spring can be one of the most frustrating seasonal shifts for many of us – mainly because we are asking our bodies, and minds, to open, expand & CHANGE…  After months of sitting in stillness with ourselves, we are now asked to engage & participate.   If you were over the winter roller-coaster last & this year and found yourself being crankier & less flexible than usual, then change that repetitive story & embrace a yoga retreat with a difference – one that will support you on all levels so you CAN make real, lasting changes in your life.

… WE’RE OFF TO BALI!!

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JOIN FELLOW SPIRITUAL WARRIORS FOR A NURTURING WEEK OF DELICIOUS ORGANIC FOOD, EMPOWERING YOGA, HEALINGS PLUS SACRED FULL MOON & PSYCHIC RITUALS… ESCAPE… BACK TO YOURSELF…

STAY TUNED FOR DETAILS & LOCATION ABOUT OUR NEXT RETREATS FOR 2012…

We have a conversation that speaks to our intellect, our heart or even more exceptionally our soul… we connect with someone in a way that seems profound, sacred and even life-changing. Amidst the myriad of feelings that surface as a result of this encounter, we experience relief, inspiration, joy, humility, excitement, reconnection (with our Self and Another), gratitude, and sometimes even awe. We feel someone is on the same wavelength or, even more inspiringly, we realise that we have much to learn from their deeper understanding and knowledge. We feel that someone understands our search for those bigger questions, those questions that formed us even before we became consciously aware of them and now that we are conscious of them, those questions that guide our life’s searching and our soul’s longing. If we then find ourselves in the privileged position of being in the presence of a true Teacher, of one who has dedicated his/ her life to their own quest for this understanding and henceforth, to answering the seeking of others and to sharing their knowledge of Life’s great mysteries, we realise that we are in the totally fortunate position of being in the presence of someone whose life’s work is that we may live more mindfully and more joyously. That is where I found myself this afternoon as I sat in Breathing Space in front of Swami Govindananda as he introduced himself and his ‘yoga philosophy beyond the mat.’

Swami Govindananda is the creator of Ji Living and as such is also known as Swami Ji. His philosophy picks up where the practice of physical yoga naturally leads us to: self inquiry; the desire to meditate; the gateway of yoga’s spiritual origins and the immeasurable benefits that we all seek… increased self awareness, positivity, happiness and health.

Swami Ji’s introduction was as understated in tone as it was reverent to his own teacher, one of only 5 of India’s great Spiritual masters, Jagadguru (literally, Spiritual Master for the Whole world in Sanskrit) Shri Kripaluji Maharaj. His style was relaxed, authentic and articulate, doted with modern paradigms and Sanskrit  ‘sutras’ (verses), as he quoted from the ancient texts in fluid Sanskrit and translated for all of us, their significance to our spiritual quest and development.

He addressed key questions, such as:

- Who are all things done for?  For our self.

- What does the self want?  Love, happiness, bliss.

- Who am I?  Not the body, but the Soul.

- What are the three illusions that ‘mess us up’?  Taking that to be permanent which is impermanent; thinking ourselves to be the body instead of the soul and looking for love, happiness and bliss, where they are not!

- What should the power of the mind be used for?  To be happy and to seek that happiness within, based on the understanding that we are the soul.

- Why do we have a soul? Because it is a part of the Supersoul (Paratman) – God and as such, it must serve its life force, God. This being the union – the ‘yug’, the root of yoga.

- Where does our happiness lie? Within.

- What happens after Death comes? The mind, the intellect, the sense organs and the soul all leave the body.

- What makes us different to the 8.4 million other bodies that have a soul in this cosmos? That the human being, because it has the mind, is the only life form that can do fruit-yielding actions that determine where we will go after this lifetime.

Swami Ji flowed in and out of the ancient texts, the teachings of his teacher and his own understanding and life journey with charisma, humour, insight and honesty. Modern parables and simple explanations showed each one of us there the importance of honouring our spiritual path as well as looking after our physical body. He spoke of the impact that our mind and our thoughts have on our life, of our mind being the driver of our life’s car and ultimately of how, when we wake up and give equal importance to nurturing our spiritual nature as well as our physical body, our attitude and lives will transform.

And so we sat there, being reminded once more, as all good teachers remind us, to nurture ourselves, to watch our reactions and to live mindfully. To study, and reflect on these questions, to meditate and to consciously manage the process of the fertilizing of our life. That there is no room for complacency; that self study, reflection and conscious action are fundamental to our happiness; that we need to know what we are doing with our mind and that we need to do the Work. That this is the essence of spirituality – a conscious life in thought, deed and action that leads us to self discovery.

And the ultimate reason and impetus for all that we do and we all that we strive for? Ananda = love, happiness, bliss.

“The wise man knows that love is inside. We own nothing but the right to love.”

These were his teachings and I felt blessed to receive them, and once more, be reminded of why we are on the yoga mat… when we are on it AND when we are not.

Hopefully we will be able to have him come back. Then everyone can meet and listen to a wise man, a generous soul and a gifted Teacher.

Written by Christina Pateras: Edited by Denby Sheather.

Workshop held on Saturday May 8th, 2010.

(*Editor’s note: Swami Govindananda’s visit was truly a blessing and I encourage anyone and everyone even remotely interested in yoga, to come along to his next teaching at the Space in the near future.  He is not to be missed twice! Heartfelt thanks again to Swami Ji, and also to his luminous assistant Carmen for lending her energy and leading us in Kirtan… such a wonderful tonic for the soul…)

This mysterious gland is small, doughnut shaped and situated at the base of the bladder.  It causes more grief for men than just about any other part of their bodies.  Although approximately 50% of Australian men may experience some type of prostate problem at some stage of their lives, until it plays up, men rarely give their prostate a second thought. It’s main function is during the sexual act – when ejaculation occurs, it secrets an alkaline fluid that forms part of the semen. This fluid nourishes the semen and provides volume to the semen, along with other seminal fluids.

Walnut sized in young men, enlargement of the prostate is common 50 years and over – approximately four in ten men over the age of 60 have it. Enlargement occurs when the glands and connective tissues surrounding the urethra thicken and block urine flow.

CAUSES

1. Aging.  As the body ages, harmless nodules develop in the tissues of the prostate, which accumulate and gradually enlarge the gland. Eventually the gland becomes large enough to “press” or “strangle” the urethra and obstruct urination.

2. Low levels of zinc. The tissues of prostate gland normally have high levels of zinc. Zinc levels gradually decrease as you grow older.

3. Over 50 testosterone levels start decreasing. This causes an increase in the quantity of dihydrotestosterone (DHT), which over produces prostate cells.

4. Postural faults and obesity could also affect prostate health. A heavy body and prolonged periods of sitting put more pressure on the pelvic region and perineum, resulting in congestion in and around the prostate.

5. Constipation could also be a cause. Hardened faeces and an overloaded rectum cause excessive pressure on the prostate gland.

SYMPTOMS

1. The first obvious one is difficulty in passing urine. This is due to compression of the urethra by the prostate blocking the flow.  You may strain or have to wait a while before being able to go.

2. A weak flow of urine starts, then stops. The stream is narrower and less powerful.

3.  Involuntary leakage – there may be a tendency to dribble urine, much like incontinence.

4.  One may find it difficult to stop urination once it is started.

5.  You visit the bathroom more often.  There may be a frequent need or urge to urinate nightly two or three times as well as during the day.

6. Even after passing urine, you are still left with the feeling of incomplete emptying of the bladder.

7. Due to prolonged obstruction, the small veins in the bladder and urethra stretch. When you strain to urinate, the veins may burst, causing blood to enter the urine.  Painful urination, called Dysuria, may occur.

8. There could be a mild pain in the lower back, hips and legs and occasional impotency.

Basically, symptoms are very similar to those experienced by women who have weak pelvic floor muscles.  Both reflect a weakness in the muscles around the genitals, bladder and reproductive organs as well as a weakness around the perineum or Root Chakra/Mulabhanda.

DIET & VITAMIN SUPPORT

The importance of the trace mineral zinc in maintaining prostate health is paramount.  Zinc is essential for prostate gland and male hormone function.  It is known as the  “Male mineral” and is required to produce sperm and seminal fluid.  A deficiency may cause impotency and infertility. It has now been well established that there is a link between prostate health and the zinc content in the prostate tissues.

DIET GUIDE

•    Maintain a low-fat diet and watch your cholesterol levels.

•    Include Omega-6 and Omega-3′s that help regulate nervous system function.

•    Bake, steam, stir-fry or make salads instead of deep-frying.

•    Choose low fat over full cream milk and make it organic.

•    Avoid fat-filled salad dressings and rich sauces that agitate the liver and heart.

•    Drink eight glasses of water daily – Green Tea is also beneficial for the prostate.

•    Increase your daily intake of fibrous foods, fresh vegetables and fruits, particularly red and red-orange ones, and increase your Vitamin C, A, B6, E, cod liver oil and flaxseed oils.

•    Check whether your intake of Vitamin D is adequate – this includes down-time to rest in the sun and allow your mind to unravel with meditation, music or power naps to help reduce your stress levels.  Stress is a major contributor to imbalances on all levels of  being (body, mind, emotional and spiritual).

•    Avoid spicy (in Yogic Ayurvedic terms, “rajasic”) foods that can increase body heat, digestive fire and agitate the emotions.

•    Watermelon seeds have natural diuretic properties which help prevent excess build-up of urine;

•    Avoid or minimize alcohol intake. Try not drinking for a few days and then re-introduce it  – after just a day you should notice whether it makes the urine symptoms better or worse. This is because alcohol constricts the bladder neck, causes dehydration and hampers the flow of urination that can lead to a restless mind and body.

•    Avoid decongestants and antihistamines that alter the body’s natural elimination processes.

•    Avoid smoking and smoky environments: there is some evidence that (as well as everything else we know it causes!), cigarette smoking indirectly affects the size of the enlarging prostate.  This could be because constricted blood vessels throughout the body affect how much oxygen and nutrient rich blood flows to the organs and extremities.

•    Avoid coffee, tea, caffeinated soft drinks and chocolate.  Some men find that their prostate problems are made worse with caffeine because the neck of the bladder is constricted by increased caffeine levels.  Again, try the elimination approach.

* Consume more soy-based foods: soy products are recommended for preventing prostate enlargement.

• Include zinc in your diet: zinc has been shown to improve urinary symptoms and reduce the size of the prostate, and can therefore be effective in preventing and reversing prostate enlargement. Vegetables high in zinc include dried beans, garbanzos, black-eyed peas, lentils, peas, beets, cabbage and whole grains. Additionally, pumpkin seeds, oats, whole wheat and rye.

* Add Selenium, Evening Primrose Oil and the amino acids daily – glutamine, alanine and lysine in particular – to maintain healthy cardiovascular and nervous system function.

HOW CAN YOGA HELP??

Yoga connects all systems and energies throughout the body and enhances blood quality, respiratory function, regulates hormone production and flow, digestion and elimination as well as helping to balance and calm the mind and emotions.  Yoga can strengthen, release and balance simultaneously and can give men the mental challenges they need depending on the sequences and stamina, agility and focus needed.   Poor circulation can exacerbate prostate problems.  Regular yoga practice can increase blood flow, deepen the breath and release neuro-muscular knots to tone and nourish all cells, organs, joints and tissues.  Any congestion or blocked prana/chi/energy will then disperse to restore harmony and well being so we feel more aligned, more as nature intended.

Yoga also helps give men a sense of exertion with calmness rather than firing up and agitating their systems.  This is particularly good because it allows them to connect with their softer side and explore aspects of their emotional selves that they may not necessarily do in a power aerobic or boxing class!, without having to sacrifice or subdue their masculinity.  They learn to listen, acknowledge and appreciate their inner voice by being on the mat and after time, may even begin to explore and express what is inside more often and with more confidence.

Yoga is all about creating unity between your mental, emotional, psychological and spiritual selves; the physical benefits are just a bonus.   Asana (postures) is what we do in order to sit and meditate comfortably with a still, undistracted mind.   It’s not about being a flexible pretzel or about proving how much longer you can hold a pose than the person beside you… something (men especially) tend to forget when the voices of competition and ego bark loudly in their ears!

By bringing particular awareness to the perineum or Root Lock/Base Chakra that governs instincts, behavior, confidence and blood quality, prostate symptoms, and the sense of feeling unsupported, may be relieved.  Once awareness is established, you then work into strengthening and governing energy through the Base Chakra which will restore foundational power in the spine and help men assert their masculinity in a confident yet calm way. The flow of Testosterone balances which helps to regulate sexual urges, desires and cravings; a person may become more kinesthetic ie more receptive and intuitive.  And when the  physical body rebalances, thoughts, responses and intentions transform into more appropriate, responsible behavior tendencies.

6 great yoga postures (that are safe and accessible for beginners) include:

(The best time to meditate is after yoga asanas, always on an empty stomach, and preferably at sunrise or sunset.)

1. Baddha Konasana (bound angle pose) – increases blood supply to pelvis, kidneys, prostate and bladder and brings awareness and energy into Mulabhanda/Root Lock.

2.  Adho Mukha Svanasana (Downward Facing Dog) – strengthens the arms & legs, lengthens the spine, opens the chest and lungs and strengthens the heart.  An excellent all-rounder pose!

3.  Bhujangasana (cobra pose variation) – knees bent with feet pointing up to ceiling – this variation contacts the kidneys more deeply and helps with hormonal flow.  Also helps to stimulate production of all male hormonal fluids by directly stimulating the bladder, kidneys and sex glands.

4.  Supta Padangusthasana – (reclining big toe pose) – relieves backache, stretches hips and hamstrings and opens the lower back so energy can flow along the kidneys and bladder meridians.

5.  Paripurna Navasana (boat pose) – tones the kidneys, abdominals and strengthens the lower back.  Keep feet on floor or hug knees to chest as you balance to switch belly on.

6.  Virasana (seated hero pose) – Meditate in this position to finish your practice.  Excellent for calming and centering the mind and digestive fire.  Focus on drawing up Mulabhanda.  Alternative is Savasana (corpse pose) for mediation.

It is no surprise that in Western society we experience some of the highest statistics for prostate (and breast) cancers.  Why?  Perhaps we place too much emphasis on the body and associated material paraphernalia, when instead we could be focusing on connecting with and honoring, not only our own spirit and potential, but each others’ as well.  Diseases that reflect ‘lack’ such as low self-esteem, depression, fatigue, sexual dysfunction and psychological imbalance are rife because we mostly operate from fear and loss rather than abundance and trust.  Maybe if we reversed our thoughts and began thinking from a positive space more often, stopped to feel and appreciate the earth beneath our feet that gives us what we need, we could reduce those statistics and replace them with high self-esteem, vitality and chronic happiness!  Are we brave enough to imagine, let alone create, such a world?

It all starts with us as individuals and that is why yoga is such an effective therapy.  On our mats we are all equal, we all have the same bodies, we feel the same sensations and we recognize our failings and triumphs in the person practicing beside us.  Yoga makes us feel and breathe and embrace.  It makes us laugh at ourselves (something I think we don’t do enough of) and ignites our compassionate, human, nature.  And with that kind of power burning inside of you, dis-ease will have a hard time staying alight.

TREATMENT

If you think you have prostate problems, don’t assume you do, have it checked out by your GP. A digital rectal exam (DRE) and, or urine and blood tests, will confirm whether or not you have Benigh Prostate Hyperplasia (BPH) or other prostate problems, and an ultra-sound test can be done to check for prostate cancer.

And of course, the best treatment is PREVENTION.

Practice daily, 20 minutes should suffice, gradually build up to longer by holding poses for more breaths, and pay attention to your breathing, how you feed yourself and what you choose to hold onto in life.

For more health and well being articles and information visit www. fitforlifeonline.com.au

Be well!

Outside through the world and it’s whispers,

But how do I go and for what do I search,

Is there peace with my brothers and sisters?

What do I do when stress raps on my skull,

Or memory squeezes my heart?

Will I be calm or spit dragon-red froth,

Allowing all faith to depart?

When I step off my mat, how will I feel?

Okay, should I keep my perspective,

But what if old habits wedge deep under skin,

And fear makes my soul less reflective?

What do I do when the emptiness aches,

And all knowledge of Self disappears?

How will I wake up, move and converse,

When all that is present are tears?

When I step off my mat, what do I take,

What light do I feel in my spirit?

What happens when ripe becomes festering black,

Will my belly be strong and digest it?

Who will be walking beside me each day,

Will companionship slip through my fingers?

And as the day darkens and night filters in,

Will love snuggle in as breath lingers?

So.. in trust, I step off, and I know where I am,

I am present and safe and connected,

Each breath is aligning me skyward to earth,

All my questions and doubts have surrendered.

Namaste…

Denby 2009

Having come from an aerobic mindset and used to pumping my body into shape regardless of how it was feeling at the time, I  was both excited and mildly amused to find myself laying of the floor of a tranquil yoga studio, covered with an old grey blanket that only my dog would appreciate, and listening to the relaxing sighs and occasional snores of the surrounding senior citizens.  Not a hip-hop thud or doof-doof basenote to be heard…

Once we were up and cross legged and had chanted the obligatory three om shanti’s, I watched with wide eyes, several students (despite their seniority), easily managing to pretzel and contort themselves into the postures demonstrated by the equally greying and elastic teacher at the front of the room… WITH fluidity, steady breathing and even a few smiles! Not even a quarter century myself yet, I was struggling to connect with my toes let alone interlace my fingers around them, instead landing palms down on my thighs as my hunched back pleaded loudly and insistently, “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!”  It was quite confronting. I was strong wasn’t I? I had good reflexes. I could lift weights, pump iron and match it with the punching bag four days a week.  Why on earth couldn’t I manage a simple forward bend?! Did everybody start out like this, feeling this sense of complete disconnection, betrayed by their own ligaments and self esteem?

All my limber classmates certainly looked like they’d been born into the lotus position. Youthfulness had deserted me today as I grunted and gritted my way through postures whose names only added to my confusion and made me crave for the sauna. I think I felt something ‘pop’ that probably shouldn’t have and I remember trying to desperately hold on to a fart that eventually escaped dangerously close to the ear of the woman beside me. Halfway through I had affectionately nicknamed the teacher ‘elastogran’, as much for her manipulation of prose as yoga postures because every sentence was a spiritual gem, tinged with triumph and tribulation and obviously leafed from her own personal library. I loved the imagery and descriptions she used for each pose and started to get lost in the stories and less attentive of my glaringly obvious inabilities. The wordsmith in me appreciated the distraction from my aching bits and pieces and before I knew it, the sequence was over and I was again laying belly up on the mat, having my neck stretched gently and a scented eye bag pressed lovingly into both eye sockets. Instant bliss and instant shame at having given her that nickname.

Someone nearby snored, another fluffed, and they both made me smile. I could feel a softness washing through me and with the next deep exhalation I felt completely at ease, totally content. My body felt incredibly relaxed and love-heavy like I’d just spent a week romping about with Brad Pitt. Even the smelly old blanket felt good.

On the way out after class I was seeing through different eyes and walking in different hips, almost the sensation of floating alongside myself and beaming from every pore. I came back the next week and the next and soon was able to not only touch my toes (perfectly pedicured in preparation!), but also arch like a cat, stretch like a dog and balance like an eagle empowered. I felt inspired and connected to myself for the first time. Each time I came to practice I could feel another layer of illusion slipping away and with that surrender, I got to meet someone I hadn’t seen in quite a while… ME. Perfect in all my imperfection, judgement and bad jokes. A work in progress and the beginning of my own healing and teaching journey.

Now I understand why so many people are drawn to yoga, why they crave the serenity and sense of oneness it brings. It doesn’t matter what age you are or whether you can physically resemble a sailors knot. It’s about letting go of all the moments preceding the present one as you strive to integrate all levels of yourself.  It’s about awareness, acceptance and patience and being brave enough to self-reflect, sit in your ‘stuff’ and still function in the everyday material world.

The gift is being happy within yourself and feeling a deeper connection to others so you begin to see and feel the myriad of similarities, rather than just differing shades of grey.

See you on the mat!

Namaste,  Denby

Join Swami Govindananda for a 3 hour workshop located at the beautiful Breathing Space Yoga studio in Avalon.

Click here for the details of this workshop